About 40 years ago I truly believed that God inspired me to write The Victor. He even gave me a scripture confirmation about it when I asked: Psalm 45:1 "My heart overflows with a good theme; I address my verses to the King; my tongue is the pen of a ready writer."
I couldn't pay family or friends to read it and shelved my dream for 15 years. In 2009 I finally got to see that book in print. My hopes began to soar that maybe, just maybe, God might want to use a nobody like me to reach others for Jesus through this book. I even got to meet the famous Christian Music Artist, whose song inspired the book in the first place, Amy Grant. Through a dear friend I was able to get that book into the hands of former President Bush, VP candidate Sarah Palin, American Idol Scotty McCreary, NY Times bestselling author, Nicholas Sparks, Facts of Life, Star Lisa Whelchel, Pastor Chuck Smith of Calvary Chapel and Amy Grant herself. What was the result? Zip Zero Nada. After a year of solid promotion, I had garnered over fifty 4- and 5-star reviews on Amazon from total strangers who later became friends. After spending a good five years (and a lot of money) doing book signings, book faires, giveaway's etc., I began to lose heart. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe God didn't want to use me or the book the way I thought He did.
Then a few months ago I thought I'd give it another shot. Since the original publisher went bankrupt in 2017 the only copies available were used. This time I was hoping things would be different, that perhaps, now was the right time. This time I even got some wonderful endorsements. So, I re published the newly edited book with a new cover, got a review crew, spent more $ to get the word out and now I'm wondering again if I should continue doing this? I get it that people are busy, and that readership has drastically declined and that I'm just a speck in an ocean of books out there. I'm still a nobody. This isn't about me. My only goal has been to introduce people to the love of God through my books; people who won't go to church, read the bible and don't want to be witnessed to. People who are like how I used to be before Jesus of Nazareth by Franco Zefferelli transformed my life for all eternity because it opened my blind eyes to God's love. I went from being an atheistic Jew with no interest in religion (especially Christianity) to becoming a passionate believer in Jesus as the Messiah since 1977. I want to share this love and knowledge that God loves YOU with everyone I meet. The Victor is my love letter to both God and to whoever reads it.
It's hard not to get discouraged at what appears to be the lack of any traction or forward motion or fruits from my efforts. What do I see as success? Book sales? No. Bestseller list? No. That somehow in some way, The Victor has introduced someone to my Jesus. That would make it all worthwhile! Is that an impossible dream?
TO DREAM THE IMPOSSIBLE DREAM (Don Quixote)
To dream the impossible dream
To fight the unbeatable foe
To bear with unbearable sorrow
And to run where the brave dare not go
To right the unrightable wrong
And to love pure and chaste from afar
To try when your arms are too weary
To reach the unreachable star
This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far
To fight for the right
Without question or pause
To be willing to march, march into hell
For that heavenly cause
And I know if I'll only be true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest
And the world will be better for this
That one man scorned and covered with scars
Still strove with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable, the unreachable, the unreachable star
And I'll always dream the impossible dream Yes, and I'll reach the unreachable star